What if you can’t have it?

What if you can’t have your thing, your special thing, your thing that makes you feel better?

What can you do?  The thought of not having it is too excruciatingly painful.  To not have that which makes you better, to not have it…NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

I must have it.  I must!  The pain is too great, it’s horrendeous.  It will destroy me, I won’t be able to survive.  I must have it, I must, I can’t do without it.  I can’t even begin to think about not having it.

Give it to me – quick, I need it – NOW!  I need it.  I must have it.  You don’t understand.  I can’t bear it if I don’t have it.  You have to give it to me.  You can’t withhold it from me, no you can’t.  I’ll fight you, I’ll fight you for it.  I’ll will.  I will kill you for it, nothing will stand in my way, nothing will stop my having it.  I must have it.  And if you can’t understand that, then fuck you.

You don’t love me.  You don’t care about me.  You hate me, I know it.  Because if you didn’t, if you did really love me, then you’d let me have it, you wouldn’t keep it from me, you wouldn’t stop me.

And I don’t care what you say.  You are mean, nasty and horrible and I don’t want to be your friend.  I hate you, because you won’t let me have what I want.  I hate you, I hate you more than anything in the world.  You’re a rotten, nasty person, and I don’t love you – I don’t.

And I never will.  It’s too late now.  I feel too bad.  I don’t now what to do.  I can’t do anything.  You’ve defeated me.  It’s over.  Nothing will ever be the same.  And you still don’t understand.  And how can you – you’ve never understood.  You’ve never wanted to understand me.