Completely healing your childhood trauma – any trauma

It’s the same for any trauma – there is only one way to heal it, and that’s to speak about all it makes you feel.

There isn’t much else you can do once the physical healing has been done other than speak about all your bad feelings. With any trauma, the greatest part is the emotional, mental, spiritual and psychic (etheric) pain one experiences, that which can remain forever if nothing is done about it. And what can you do? Speak about it, about all you’re feeling about it. And keep on speaking about it until there is simply no more to speak about. Something which can possibly take years to do.  If you don’t speak about it, it will fester away inside you until such pain builds forcing you to one day break and speak about it.

So you decide that the only way you’re going to heal all you’ve suffered is to speak about every bad feeling that comes up to do with it. And so naturally you’ll need someone to speak to – a friend. And a willing friend, someone who wants to hear about all your suffering. But what do you do when you don’t have such a person in your life? All you can do it want such a person, and think and feel and in some way try to express all you feel about it, about not having such a person. And one day I’d like to imagine there will be volunteer ‘friends’, people willing and wanting to listen. But in the meantime, I guess you’ll just have to do the best you can, using professional counsellors and therapists if you afford them. And although writing about all you feel is a poor alternative, I find it a great help in allowing me to accept all I feel and not push the bad feelings aside so easily. But at some stage, you’ve got to speak about all you feel.

You need a lot of help, and it’s going to take a long time, and there will be lots to speak about. A hell of a lot. And if your traumas are from your early childhood, then there will be a huge amount of hidden repressed bad feelings all of which will have to come out if you want to heal it all.

But where do you begin, as you can’t just say, right, today I will speak about my early childhood trauma and how bad I feel about it all, and there it all is, all the bad feelings ready and waiting for you to start talking about them. But there will be some bad feelings associated with it, so this is where you begin, you start talking about them.

And you start talking about them in a meaningful way. You speak about seriously wanting to find out and understand all about your pain: why you are suffering, why it was done to you, and how it all came about. You talk about it desiring – longing – to know ALL about it – the whole TRUTH of it.

So you now have a purpose to speak about your pain and bad feelings. You have a goal, something to aim for: the truth of what happened to you. It’s not enough to just say, I want to talk about it so I can heal it. The uncovering of and finding out about the truth of it all IS the healing.

The healing is done, and the pain will leave you, ONLY WHEN YOU FIND THE TRUTH OF WHAT IS CAUSING THE PAIN.

And to find the truth you will need to speak about every little aspect of it. And to do this you will have to pay attention to all your bad feelings and speak about them all as you feel them.

Your bad feelings are your way into the truth – into the TRUTH OF YOURSELF.

And to want to uncover the truth of yourself means you might have to face some tough, ugly, stuff about yourself and your relationship with your parents or early carers who have traumatised you. But you just have to keep speaking about it all – all the bad feelings. And the deeper and more significant your trauma, the longer and the more bad feelings hidden away inside you there will be waiting to come out.

And in a way, having a trauma that keeps making you feel bad, that unhinges you keeping you from so-called normal life, can even be seen as a good thing, as it will give you a specific focus and way into your past, allowing you to uncover the truth of your pain, evolve your conscious awareness of yourself and the truth of your early relationships. For people who don’t have such ongoing pain gnawing away at them, who believe they are relatively okay in life, it will be much harder to go back into their early childhood and see what terrors they are covering up.  And the terrors will be there even though they might not feel traumatised.

And how you speak about your bad feelings matters too.

You need to express them by really putting yourself in them and trying to allow ‘them’ to speak. You try to emote the pain, you try to allow the pain to express itself, to come out and put itself into words. As you speak you focus on nothing other than your bad feelings, you let them consume you, you BE them, you submit to them, you sink into them, or bring them up all around and in you. (And if you are worried that your horrible feelings will overwhelm you, destroy you, sending you into madness if you finally let go, so long as you’re speaking about all such fears, and always longing to uncover the truth of them, as hard as it will be, you will be okay.) And you use your feeling expression to block out your mind, to stop all thoughts and any justifications or rationalisations you might have that your mind presents to you trying to stop you feel and speak about your bad feelings.

If you commit yourself to speaking about all the bad feelings you feel related to your trauma, life will present you with all the opportunities you’ll need to stir up your hidden bad feelings, all so you can express them.

The uncovering of the truth of your trauma to heal it, is a whole journey in and of itself, as those who have done it will testify. It’s not like taking a pill and the pain magically goes away. It’s a laborious process because it involves all aspects of yourself, namely the many beliefs and behaviours all of which constitute the fabric of your being. You suffered a lot of pain and bad feeling as the trauma happened, and it might have happened over years, so you have formed about it, it is a part of you. So to go back into it, to unwind and bring to light your relationship with it, is going to be very challenging as your bad feelings take you into looking at all the negative ‘circuitry’ within you. And to ‘reprogram’ yourself will be very hard, but will naturally occur (you won’t have to do anything with your mind to make it happen) as the truth is revealed.

And mostly it’s a highly personal journey, one another person can’t understand or fully relate to because they didn’t experience your trauma. So you will feel very alone at times, but such feelings are yet more bad feelings to speak about, and so on it goes, endlessly speaking about your bad feelings.

But what else can you do?

Never underestimate the importance of speaking about how bad you feel. It is the way and the key to help and heal yourself. And it’s the only thing you’ve got that you can do to help yourself.  Speak!

What happens when you repress bad feelings?

You get sick. Your sickness may not immediately show itself, but it will. And it might not show itself only on the physical level as in physical illness, it might show emotionally, mentally or spiritually. And it might not even show during your physical life, it might manifest when you are in spirit. But what you can be sure of is, it will show itself one day, because it has to – it has to show you that you are doing something bad to yourself by repressing your feelings.

Your feelings are you. If you repress and deny any part of yourself, then you are hurting yourself. You’re not being loving of yourself. You are hating yourself. You are rejecting your own self-expression, your own presence and being in life. And if you do this then you will get sick. Because what you are really doing is killing yourself. By stopping yourself express and so fully experience your feelings you may as well be hitting yourself on the head with a hammer, or sawing off your fingers, then your arm, then…

So it’s a blessing that you get sick. And ALL sickness, all illness – ALL PAIN – ONLY occurs as a result of your repressing feelings. It’s the repressing of your bad feelings that IS the pain. It is what causes you so much pain, and causes all the bad things to happen to you to make you sick.

If you can look at being sick as your system telling you loud and clear that you are repressing feelings somewhere within you, then you might want to find out where and how you are. And you can do this by doing your Feeling-Healing. Which simply involves doing the opposite to what you are doing: express and speak and bring out all your feelings, whilst longing for and wanting to know the reasons why – the truth – you are feeling them. And you will find there are very valid reasons.

Being sick is not just bad luck – for some unknown reason you have got sick. And it’s not just because you smoke too much; you’re too stressed; it’s genetic; you eat too much red meat; too many eggs; too much salt; you don’t do enough exercise; you happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time when that flu ridden person breathed all over you.

These are the things your system will use to manifest your feeling denial. So if you get cancer from smoking too many cigarettes, and you really want to know why, then the reasons are going to be found in why you need to smoke. Why do you need to do this thing to yourself, slowly poisoning yourself, slowly killing yourself, which in the end does kill you? Why do you need to smoke to cover up the bad feelings you are repressing? And the why is because you are slowly killing yourself by denying some aspect of yourself. And this aspect is represented by the feelings you are denying and repressing. So your system has manifest your death from cancer to show you what you are doing to yourself – killing yourself. And it’s not just bad luck, or that your mother died from the same cancer so you’re more prone to it; it’s because you are killing yourself – rejecting yourself – your own life – by rejecting your feelings.

Why you suddenly catch the Swine Flu is because your system now has it available to use to show you how you are rejecting and denying a part of yourself. So it makes you ‘catch’ the virus. And then how having the virus makes you feel, how feeling sick makes you feel, you will discover, were you to express all such bad feelings, are the very same bad feelings you are rejecting and repressing. So you bring to yourself the vehicle – the virus – to help reflect and show to you just what you are doing to yourself. And if you don’t need the virus to help you show you this, then you won’t catch it. And if you do need it and you take shots to prevent it helping you see – through your bad feelings – what you are doing to yourself, then you are only covering up your self-rejection, repressing and burying your bad feelings even more. All of which will one day force themselves to the surface manifesting in some other greater pain.

And the difficulty we face is that most of our bad feeling repression has begun during our early childhood, we’ve been repressing feelings for a long time. And so to heal such causes, as to why we are doing this horrible thing to ourselves, requires a lot of very hard work on oneself, and will involve the healing of your childhood repression. Again which you can do through your feeling-healing.

And any further feeling suppress and keeping those feelings repressed as an adult, will only reinforce and add to that which you are keeping going from early childhood. And taking it another step, the only reason why you would repress any feelings as an adult is because it’s what you’ve learnt and been made to do as a young child. It’s all apart of how you are.

If you want to stop your feeling repression and so stop the need for it manifesting and making yourself sick, then be aware that every time you go to the doctor and have things done to you to take the pain away you are only burying more of yourself and will have to pay in pain some day for it.

But I say that not to make you stop going to the doctor – you have to always do what you feel you want to do. I say it just to help you become more aware of what you are doing, and what the consequences might be. So if now you don’t know what to do: go to the doctor or not, take something to get rid of the pain or not, all you can do is your feeling-healing: keeping on speaking about all you feel and longing for the truth of such feelings, whilst you go or don’t go to the doctor.

IT’S THE ONGOING SPEAKING ABOUT – BRING UP AND EXPRESSING ALL YOUR BAD FEELINGS – THAT IS VITALLY IMPORTANT. It doesn’t matter if you keep doing things to further deny and repress feelings in the short term, whilst you get the hang of speaking about all you feel. It’s just so important to speak about all your pain and bad feelings instead of just wiping them aside pretending you’re not feeling such things.

If the pain gets too much, of course you do what you need to do, and whilst doing it, keep speaking about just how bad it’s making you feel, and how feeling such bad feelings make you feel; and keep wanting to uncover the reasons hidden within you as to why you are experiencing such bad feelings. And as the truth comes, the pain will lessen and so will your need to make yourself sick.

5. Staying true to your feelings – living true to yourself.

Yet another aim of doing your feeling-healing to heal your childhood repression is so you can live true to yourself. By doing this – it being achieved by living true to your feelings – you will no longer experience any feeling denial.

Our parents by interfering with our natural self-expression caused us to live untrue to ourselves and our feelings. And each feeling we don’t fully honour, accept and express, stays repressed within us, waiting until one day when we go back to it, allowing it its freedom.

As we grew up, as we formed, having been made to stop focusing on ourselves by expressing all we felt, we have learnt to deny ourselves, with our denial beginning with our feelings. So as adults we live negative self and feeling-denying lives; lives which cause us much pain and unhappiness.

We live in a desperate battle to not feel bad, to not allow our fear and unhappiness – all the bad feelings resulting from not feeling loved and being rejected countless times by those who should have loved us – to surface. All we do – our whole adult life – is bad feeling avoidance. We put so much time and effort into it, creating a hostile unloving unfeeling world that helps us in our headlong pursuit of self-destruction. Destruction of nature and ourselves, ourselves also being nature, something we seemed to have forgotten.

But we don’t see or feel this because we don’t truly see or feel ourselves. We look at ourselves and our life through heavily distorted perceptions, through the eyes of our parents; eyes that were of a negative soul-destroying mind and will.

Every pain that you experience, the ones you are conscious and unconscious of, are being caused by your repressed early childhood feelings. If you cut yourself with a knife whilst preparing dinner, the pain you feel, were you to accept and express with the intention of uncovering the truth of your childhood repression, will, if you apply the feeling-healing principles, lead you back into your forming years helping you see more about yourself. More about what went on back then between yourself and your parents, and how it has led to your cutting yourself with the knife and all the pain you are feeling.

Your feeling-healing is an extraordinary process, but will only work if your true motive is to become true: true to yourself and true to all you feel. If you manage to do this, then you will discover every part of your hidden self, with all that you do in your adult life being completely explained and understood.

When you have released every repressed feeling within you, then you will naturally be living true, being able to freely express all you feel as you experience all your wonderful feelings, good and bad. No longer will you fear and hate your bad feelings, experiencing them with the full exhilaration they provide – no longer with you fearing and hating yourself.

4. The importance of FOCUSING on your feelings.

Focusing on your feelings is focusing on yourself.

We have been taught to focus on our parents instead of ourselves. They demanded we pay attention to them, doing what they wanted, being how they wanted us to be. So as a result, we ‘lost’ the ability to remain self-focused, to remain in tune with what we felt. We were made to deny many of our feelings, to stop experiencing them, whilst making our mind take over.

With our mind we now control much of our feeling inspiration, even to the extent of contriving feelings to match the learnt beliefs and behavioural patterns our parents made and forced us to accept.

I believed I felt loved. Had you asked me before my Feeling-Healing, I would have said, yes, of course I know what love feels like. But now as the falseness of such love feelings has been revealed to me, I’m not so sure. I don’t know what love feels like, as all I knew it to be has proved to not be love at all, merely something I was told was love and believed felt like love.

Parents – and you can observe it all the time, especially with young children – because they are not self-focused or truly self-aware, focus too heavily on their children, seeing as it were, themselves in their children, even ‘being’ their children and so treating their children as they would themselves. They yell at and criticise their children, telling them how to be, as if their 1 and 2 year old toddler is an adult. They speak to their young children as if it should know better – even telling it so, as if it is an adult but for some reason isn’t behaving as it should be – as they have been made to behave.

It’s the weirdest thing, totally absurd and shocking to see, when a parent yells at its child as if the child were a grown up person. And telling it off because ‘it should know better’, abusing it because ‘how many times have I told you not to do that!’, and yet they are speaking to a little person who can’t possibly know what its parent is talking about. It doesn’t see the world through its parents eyes, and yet its chastised and yelled at until its crying for not doing so. The parents look and act like compete morons, badgering their poor uncomprehending child into being something it can’t possibly be. It’s outright child – person – abuse. If adults spoke to each other like that, you’d end up fighting or never having anything to do with each other again. Yet the child can’t leave, and it can’t fight. It can’t assert itself, and it’s all too easily overpowered. It’s forced to weather the angry tirade time and time again. And this treatment of their child, the parent would say, is loving, forcing it way beyond itself to be as the parent is. And to end up nothing more than a clone, a non-person, a shadow of it’s parents. So if this is love, then something is seriously very wrong. It’s not love, it’s only a fucked up mind believing and saying it’s love. And most parents are fucked up children, fucked up by their own parents, who shouldn’t have had children in the first place.

My parents shouldn’t have had me. They didn’t make me feel truly loved and wanted. And they forced me to focus so heavily on them that I became totally dependant on them, with very little independence of my own. I had so little of my own self-identity, and so few feelings of self-awareness. I was nothing more than a sad, fucked up, confused, miserable copy of them. And I now have nothing to do with them. My childhood repression healing and my search for my true-self got me away from their controlling ways. And nothing of what I used to call ‘my love for them’ exits any longer. My father is dead, yet my mother still persists in holding onto the fantasy that she loved me and I love her, and that one day when I’ve come to my senses, I will return to her, being once again her loving and dutiful son.

And I have told her no-way, it’s over; that I don’t love her; that their never was any love between us; that it was all unreal, and yet she won’t listen to me because she never did. She just persists in living in her own mind, cut off and separated from her own true feelings. And really I can’t blame her, I only need look at how unlovingly she was treated by her parents.

But the greatest move I made in my life was to turn away from my family, to end my role in the play of falseness. To say good-bye it’s over, and to get on with my feeling-healing and the discovery of my true-self. To slowly return my focus to myself and away from them. Beginning by focusing on how I really do feel – living true to my feelings; and particularly my bad ones, as I express them and long and look for their truth: the truth that when seen, enables me to slowly return my focus to my true-self – me.

I am still not fully self-focused, my childhood repression healing not finished, but at least I now know where all my problems are, and I am expressing my bad feelings that arise because of them. Accepting the feelings, longing to see the truth of them, and finding it.

My focusing on my bad feelings is my focusing on myself, the unwanted, rejected, unloved self. And each time I bring up more and express them, I am bringing myself out so I can get to know myself – the truth of me.  And this makes me feel loved.

3. The importance of LONGING for the Truth.

Now while you are accepting yourself as you truly feel and telling your friend all about it, you can desire and long to know why you feel the bad feelings you feel.

Why do you feel bad? The answer – the TRUTH – is within you. And it’s through your feelings (by accepting and expressing them), and desiring and longing for the truth, you can uncover it.

Wanting the truth; wanting to know the truth with all your heart, is what drives your finding it.

You can use your feelings to help you uncover the truth of what you are feeling now in any experience; and you can also use them to take you back within yourself to the truth of your early childhood.

You long and want to know the truth with all your will, whilst you keep talking about and expressing all you feel. These two actions are the key to healing yourself. You don’t have to always do them at the same time, but when you feel to do them. Mostly you concentrate on expressing your bad feelings, then during a pause, natural or contrived, you can long for the truth of them; then continue expressing them.

You never force the truth. You never use your mind to try and make it come. You never use your mind to try and answer the question: why am I feeling these feelings. It will come of it’s own accord when you’ve expressed all you’ve needed to. The truth is the pot of gold at the end of your feeling-rainbow.

In seeking to know the truth of your childhood, when you experience something that makes you feel bad, as you accept and speak about it, the bad feeling may seem to grow and expand making you feel far worse than you first did; this happening as you tap into and access, and start to bring up, your associated hidden repressed feelings. Your bad feeling experience now acts as a trigger to help take you back into your early childhood repressed bad feelings. And to complete your Feeling-Healing, this is what you want to happen, so potentially as all your buried yuk and bad feelings start to rise, you’re going to feel even worse than you did. And as this meant to happen, it shows you’re on the right track.

And here’s where wanting to know why you feel bad comes in. You want to know why you have such hidden and repressed bad feelings.

You want to know, and so long and desire to know with all your being, to find the answer. You long to see the WHOLE TRUTH of ALL you are feeling. And what you see might not be too pleasing, but you just have to keep going.

And it’s not until the truth shows itself, which it will do so long as you stay focused on accepting and expressing your bad feelings, that your healing will be complete. When you see the truth; when you see what your feelings are showing you, then your healing is done. That part of you you are denying, being denied through your feelings, will no longer be rejected. So as you will no longer be rejecting this part of yourself, there will no longer be any reason for you to feel bad. All the bad feelings that have been locked away inside you having finally come out. With the result being that you now know yourself a little more, just how you would and should have done when you were forming.

The whole reason why you are doing your feeling-healing – why you want to heal your childhood repression – is not only to heal yourself of all your pain, but to understand what went on in your relationships with your parents and carers when you were small. What they did to you that caused you such pain and the repression of so many bad feelings. And facing this truth will no doubt bring into question a lot of what you believe your relationship with your parents is about.

What is the aim of healing your childhood repression?

It is to find the truth of your childhood repression; and of course, to heal all your pain, trauma and suffering. The finding of the truth is the sign that there is no longer any pain left hidden within you.

And it is to uncover within yourself – all through your feelings – the truth of your relationship with your parents and anyone else who was influential in your life during your forming years.

And the truth all boils down to whether or not you feel loved. And how much you do or don’t feel loved.

And this includes other aspects, such as: do you feel wanted by your parents, do you feel you were important to them; how did they not want you, how did they reject you; how did they love and accept you making you feel special and important to them ?

And associated with all the negative parts is pain – a huge amount of pain contained in you as repressed bad feelings. All those feelings you would have felt when not feeling as loved, wanted and special as you needed to feel. And all those bad feelings are buried inside you, crippling your self-expression and your ability to feel good about yourself.

To find the truth is very difficult, because who wants to discover that they weren’t loved, that they weren’t wanted, that they were unimportant to their parents. But it’s the truth of such feelings that needs to be seen and fully accepted – FULLY FELT. That which you will do as you work your way through your childhood repression healing.

2. The importance of EXPRESSING your feelings.

Having admitted to yourself you’re living in feeling-denial, the next step in your self-acceptance and Feeling-Healing is to allow your bad feelings to be, and then have their say. But this can be very difficult too, because it means you will actually FEEL THEM, which means, you will FEEL BAD. And feeling bad is NOT how you want to feel, for if it were, you wouldn’t be denying them – would you?

So you’re going to have to allow yourself to feel bad, and this can also be very scary and painful. But there is no way out of it. However, you don’t have to just impassively let your bad feelings swamp you, you can do something about feeling them, you can speak about them – express them. As they surface you let them come out. The opposite to denying them. And some feelings, like anger, feel like they can’t wait to come out. Others, such as sadness, misery, or guilt, threaten to bear down on you crushing you with their burden; rushing out being the last thing they want to do preferring to just immerse you in their state until you drown with depression. But these feelings too have to come out – you just have to work harder at speaking up and expressing them.

Your repressed bad feelings are like poison in you. And each one you can speak out is talking some of the poison out of you.

So give voice to your bad feelings: talk about them, emote them, express them. Give them life – feel as bad as they make you feel, and speak out such bad feelings.

It is vitally important that you speak them out – express them, it’s the ONLY way to rid yourself of your repressed feelings. And the longer they stay within you, the worse they will affect you. Your talking about them is your saying to the world (and to yourself) that you – your bad feelings – have a right to exist. Speaking them out is your demonstration in the world of that right.  It’s literally bringing you up and out of your repressed state of being.

And when you speak and express them, tell a friend. A friend being anyone who wants to listen to how bad you are feeling.

During your early forming life, no one cared about you; no one wanted to listen, no one wanted you to tell them how bad you felt. No one came to help you. No one was listening; you had no one to go to. For if you did, you wouldn’t be denying your bad feelings, would you? Your patterns would be the opposite, and expressing them would be second nature to you.

So with a friend, now you have someone who does care; someone you can tell all your pain, anger, misery etc. to. Someone who feels sympathetic to you; someone who’s on your side – a good friend.

So now you can feel bad and tell someone who cares about you. You can go to them taking about all your bad feelings, and cry. And they won’t tell you to stop, go away, shut up, go tell someone else – they won’t reject you. They will welcome this bad feeling you into the world, helping it – you – to finally come out of hiding. And their unconditional acceptance of you will show you that speaking about how bad you feel is not going to cause a bad thing to happen to you.

Finally you can start to bring out and liberate these denied parts of yourself. And all because someone wants and accepts you totally as you are – and that someone is, not only your friend, but YOU!

1. The importance of ACCEPTING your feelings.

Your feelings are you – you can’t get closer to the real you than through your feelings.

Your feelings are very important. Far more than anything to do with your mind: beliefs, behaviour patterns, thoughts, fantasies, hopes, dreams.

Your feelings are the most important part of you, so why do you deny so many of them? If they are you, why don’t you accept them, allow them to be – feel them? Don’t you want to accept all of yourself?

Monitor yourself through the day if you don’t think you do deny any of your feelings, and see if you can catch yourself pushing them away.

For example: If you feel suddenly angry, what do you do with your anger? Do you allow yourself to be fully angry – as angry as you feel? Or, do you tone it down, resist and fight your own angry feeling? Or, does it depend on the situation and who you are with – or who you are angry at? Do you fear being angry – as angry as you possibly can? Are you scared of what you might do if you just let go? And do you believe it bad to be angry – shouldn’t you always be nice, considerate, all-accepting and able to control such feelings? After all, what will people think of you if you express your anger?

So think again: are you denying any of your feelings?

If you are, why? Why deny yourself any part of yourself? Surely you want to be the full expression of yourself? How can you hope to live a happy and fulfilled life if you are denying any part of yourself?

So why are you denying feelings? And why in particular, bad ones?

So do you see, you live a huge amount of each day constantly denying a lot of what you feel. You stop yourself feeling, and so experiencing the fullness of life. You stop yourself experiencing all you feel, retarding and limiting your self-expression. So how can you maximise your experiences in life, in your relationships, if you can’t FEEL?

And if you live denying and blocking out any of yourself, let alone all those countless bad feelings, what’s it going to do to you? And I’m sure you know what happens if you live denying a part of yourself –  you’re going to get sick, aren’t you? And more than likely at some point you won’t feel good being all blocked up inside with repressed bad feelings.

So if you want to help yourself end your feeling-denial, then you have to accept your feelings. Or at least want to, because it’s not as easy to do as it sounds.

It’s heavily programmed in you to deny your bad feelings. It started as a young child and it’s become second nature to you. And every time you do it you’re reinforcing the negative pattern affirming the belief and behaviour that it’s right for you to do it. But it’s slowly killing you – that’s what self-denial will do. With it’s ultimate goal to deny your existence, to rub you out all together. All being done to yourself by yourself. So it’s not very loving, is it?

True self-love – self-acceptance, begins with accepting how you are. So admitting to yourself you deny many of your bad feelings is where you begin. This is you admitting you live in self and feeling-denial. And it’s okay, you’re not going to get punished – you’re already punishing yourself enough.

So your Feeling-Healing begins by admitting, accepting and honouring the fact that you don’t like, nor want, a lot of your bad feelings, and trying to see how you deny and push them aside.

This is all the first step of bad-feeling denial acceptance. The first step of understanding about a major part of your relationship with yourself – how you and some of your feelings don’t get along.

And in accepting this, then what do you do? You speak up about them – you express them; you bring them up and out of you – ALL you feel.

Feeling bad is Good! It’s okay to feel bad.

Feeling bad is Good! It’s okay to feel bad.

Feeling bad is good. Feeling bad is good. Feeling bad is GOOD!

It’s not bad to feel bad – it’s good.

FEELING BAD IS GOOD. Very good!!!

And feeling really bad is also good. And feeling worse is even better.

It’s all very good! It’s okay to feel bad. Bad feelings are okay. It’s good to feel bad.

Bad feelings are GOOD!

It’s good to feel bad about feeling bad. Bad feelings are YOUR feelings. YOUR bad feelings have a right. A right to exist. A right for you to feel them.

Your bad feelings are a part of you. Bad feelings are good and they are your feelings!

ACCEPT THEM!

It’s okay to feel bad, there is nothing wrong with feeling bad. You might not like feeling bad, but it’s okay to feel bad.

You are allowed to feel bad. Bad feelings shouldn’t be dismissed.

Bad feelings already feel unwanted, why make them feel more rejected?

You are your bad feelings – if you reject them, you are rejecting yourself. Why are you rejecting yourself? Why are you rejecting your bad feelings? Is this how you want to life – rejecting a natural part of yourself? Is this how you want to live – rejecting your bad feelings?

Feeling bad is normal. We all feel bad. We all feel bad a lot of the time, even if we won’t admit it, or even if we’re not aware of it.

There are many bad feelings, all sorts of different bad feelings, and they are a normal part of you – of everyday life.

Bad feelings – your bad feelings – are to be welcomed. Bad feelings are to be wanted. Bad feelings are to be accepted.

Bad feelings are to be loved.

If you ignore or deny or dismiss or reject your bad feelings, what are you really doing? Denying, dismissing, rejecting yourself. Is this what you want to do?

You are your bad feelings – Your bad feelings are you.

Bad feelings have just as much right to life as good feelings.

Be true to your bad feelings – acknowledge, honour and accept them!

Accept your feelings. Accept yourself.

For more on feeling bad, see link to my free book over there on the right – Feeling bad is GOOD!

How to uncover childhood trauma.

During my Feeling-Healing my childhood trauma have steadily been revealed to me, layer upon layer of them as they reach back into the very depths of my psyche.

When I first began my childhood repression healing I wasn’t aware of my repressed childhood bad feelings or any traumas. I just had parts of me, mostly behaviour, I wasn’t happy with. And I also felt scared a lot and unhappy, and nothing I seemed to do changed this, or did for a short time, but then the ever present ‘down’ feeling would return. I understood I wasn’t perfect and thought surely there must be a way to become so, and to become happy, but I also thought all I had to do was alter my way of seeing things and thinking and that would do the trick. How wrong I was!

The first big shock, as it became apparent, and virtually a trauma to me in itself, was that all I thought my loving relationships with my parents was, was not loving. And as I went further into my new and shocking feelings of feeling unloved by the very people I had believed loved me, I came to accept my whole early childhood experience was traumatic.

Then within this, smaller, yet very significant trauma, started to show themselves. Such as: when I had a half-brick thrown in my face at the age of three; conception – the realisation that they didn’t want me; my birth – a Caesarian, and the accompanying abandonment and rejection I felt from my mother; my time ‘in her’ during her pregnancy; my time during her emotional out-bursts and rages as I was growing up; my school years. But overall, all my bad feelings, feeling unloving and unwanted by my parents, and my grandmothers steadfast refusal of this, insisting that nothing was wrong, cementing into me my bad feeling denial.

Compared to some people who suffered a major trauma or a long series of them: sexual child abuse, death of a parent, severe and repeated illness, for example, I have not experienced anything too extreme, and for a long time during my healing, because no such repressed memories containing such ‘really bad’ traumas surfaced, I didn’t give my own bad feelings their full due.

But slowly as I felt more and more unloved, and understood how badly it’s fucked me up, together with all my negative self-control and denial, I have come to appreciate that no matter what ones trauma is, if one was made to feel unloved to the extend of feeling ones existence was threatened, then there isn’t a greater trauma to be experienced.

And when I have been placed back in such horrendous feelings, the pain is all but too great and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. Accept those who did it to me.

In other posts I have outlined the Feeling-Healing method of bad feeling acceptance I have used to do my childhood repression healing, and I would say that if you use it, with the help of a friend or therapist, then it won’t be long before you move into the buried traumas of your early life.

And if you are already aware of some of them, by doing your feeling-healing you will be able to go with all the feelings of them, bringing them all out by speaking about them, and find their truth, thereby healing them.

And throughout your childhood repression healing, not only will you deal with your repressed childhood trauma, but all the ones you have experience through your adolescence and adult life.

Doing your feeling-healing is a complete healing, helping you to uncover every bit of truth about yourself and your whole life, all being done through your ongoing bad feeling acceptance.