Evil – the denial of personality

We live in a negative self-denying state of mind and will, and consequently we are evil. We can blame each other for being evil: ‘he’s evil, look at all the evil things he does, whereas I am not, I am good, look at all the good, kind and loving things I do’, and yet it’s still all within the negative, all within evil.

We live on a world that exists in rebellion against all that is good and loving, all that is right and true – all that is perfect. We only need look at our relationship with nature to see this. We see the other creatures that share our world as things to use and abuse to make us feel good – to give us feelings of power. We denigrate our environment not because we love it so much, but because we feel so denuded of love ourselves. And something that is true, pure and perfect we can’t allow to exist just as our parents didn’t allow us to exist in our true and perfect states when we were coming into being. Nature must come down to our level and be as we are, as that is all we know.

When we look at how many bad feelings we fail to allow ourselves to feel – feelings that are us, feelings that want and should be expressed – we can only conclude that something is very wrong. And it is. We exist in rebellion against our own nature, we use and abuse ourselves trying to maintain the corruption that exists within us. We only abuse nature because we abuse our own nature, because our parents abused us – it’s what we’ve learnt to sadly believe is the right way to be. We don’t seek to be kind and caring to ourselves by stopping our feeling- and self-denial, we do the very opposite. And in doing so we are stopping ourselves from freely and fully expressing all we are – our personality.

God is Personality. We don’t really understand this, nor understand it’s significance. We can accept and willingly say, God is love, but that allows us to keep the Personality of God somewhat removed from ourselves. Were we to accept that God is Personality, then we’d come to understand that personality is very important. And we’d begin to see that all of Creation is God expressing Their Personality. The Mother and Father have a feeling and they express it. We – humanity – are a result of one such ‘feeling’. God doesn’t hold back in Their expression of personality, allowing both the perfect and imperfect to exist side by side, so why do we?

To understand the problems of humanity – and indeed we all know we do have many – one needs to understand that expression of personality is above all else, for without it there is no love. If there is no personality how can you experience love? Sure love may still exist, but without full personality expression you’ll never know about it.

So we need to attend to our personality understanding how we are denying its full expression – our personality being the sum total of ALL our attributes that define us as the individual we are, including all our thoughts, feelings, emotions, dreams, aspirations, desires together with all our physical, spiritual and behavioural characteristics. We need to look to God as Personality so we can look our own personality. And it doesn’t take much to see that we are living anti-personality, anti what we’ve been created to be.

We are meant to be the shining glory of our personality, not shrivelled up, disease ridden, poor pathetic creatures addicted to all sorts of things that are harmful to us and help to keep our self and personality denial in place.

Look at how addicted you are to your wrong childhood beliefs and behaviours, all of which are driving and maintaining your self-destructive rebellious negative state of being. Look at what your parents did to you and what you are still doing to yourself – look at what you are doing to your own children. Your parents didn’t want to know you as you wanted them to, they didn’t allow you to fully and freely come into being. They told you how they wanted you to be applying many conditions, and you had no option but to comply.

Your parents treated you evilly, and so now you evilly treat yourself, along with evilly treating everyone and everything else you have anything to do with. And by denying yet one small part of your personality, by not freely and fully expressing it – ALL Of YOURSELF, you are not being true, perfect and so are untrue, imperfect – evil. And as none of us want to see and accept this about ourselves, we all put on a false face, false smile, and pretend we are happy and all-loving. All whilst we set about doing to our children all the wrong that was done to us.

Humanity can’t go on denying itself its full personality expression unless it just wants to exist in ever increasing amounts of pain and suffering. Has the world with modernisation – ‘the answer to everything’ – actually decreased its pain and suffering? I don’t think so. And so we will only continue to feel worse and have to do more extreme things to ourselves hiding these bad feelings as we ‘progress’. And one day we’ll start to wake up and wise up to the fact that our type of progress is only progressing deeper into our unloving negative states. That it’s all an illusion that it’s making us feel happier, healthier and more loving. That it’s all only taking us further away from our true selves, deeper into our self- and feeling denial, deeper into personality suppression. Deeper into our evil state of anti love and anti all that is good, true and beautiful.

Love is evil

On our world it is.

Just look at how we treat our children.

Just look at how we treat our pets.

Just look at how we treat our farm animals.

Just look at how we treat nature.

Just look at how we treat ourselves.

And we say we love all these things.

And this is the truth we have to accept.

This is the truth you will have to accept if you want to live true.

This is the truth of the negative state we all live in.

This is the truth you will uncover through your feeling-healing.

This is the truth we refuse and are so afraid to face.

And yet this is you.

It is me too, and I am slowly accepting it. It is what my healing is revealing to me about myself.

I am wrong. I am false. I am unloving – I am evil.

And I don’t want to be. 

And isn’t this post pretty?  And doesn’t that just say it all?

How I am presenting Childhood Repression and its healing?

The problem of childhood repression exists because we were unlovingly treated by our parents during our forming years. With such negative treatment resulting in our inability to fully and freely express all we feel. We deny many of our bad feelings, having been made to fear them, all of which causes us untold problems. Our childhood repression is simply all the bad feelings we were not allowed to express still trapped – repressed – within us, being held in place by our erroneous beliefs and self denying behaviour.

Much focus is given to a traumatic period or event during childhood that is causing many problems in adult life. And if such an early childhood trauma can be healed, then all the resulting problems will go, allowing one to get on with ones life, unhampered by such trauma. And to achieve this may require years of deep penetrating psychological therapy and counselling, all bringing to light the buried pain and truth of what it was all about.

My approach to dealing with childhood repression is slightly different than just specifically focusing on one major problem or traumatic area. It’s not about just trying to fix certain known, or even unknown – unconscious – problems, so when fixed, one can get on with ones life as one would have been able to had such trauma never occurred.

I’m trying to present a more overall view of the problem. That being – and requiring an acceptance of – the fact that our whole life, all we are, is wrong. It’s all negative, reflected in our ongoing denial of our bad feelings and other aspects of ourselves.

And that even if some parts of our upbringing were good; and even if we felt loved and enjoyed our family life, still, it’s all been lived within a negative mind and will state, so is still self-denying.

And that our whole world and society is an expression of our negative unloving state, which our continual abuse of nature – nature existing for us to conqueror – being the sign that we are living the wrong way.

So within our complete traumatic negative state, certainly some people have suffered very severe specific traumas, and as much as they do require healing, should be kept in context within the overall picture that they are only a ‘localised’ problem.

So to do your Feeling-Healing is to take on the WHOLE of your childhood repression – all that is wrong or imperfect within you. So it involves, not only healing all your major traumas, but also every part of your being that doesn’t express itself properly and truly; every part of you that is self-denying; every incorrect belief and behaviour, all with the aim of ultimately having the perfect relationship with yourself, your partner, nature and God.

It is a COMPLETE healing of ones negative self-denying, self-rejecting mind and will condition. An incredible inner transformation from the negative to the positive – healing ones self from living untrue to living true.

So it’s not just a matter of healing a specific trauma and then getting on with your negative self-denying life feeling much better about yourself; it’s about healing the COMPLETE TRAUMA OF EXISTING IN AN UNLOVING STATE.

It is wanting absolute self-love – the ultimate healing process of self-help.

The trouble with how I am presenting childhood repression is that there is little understanding or appreciation that our whole condition – how are are and how we live our life – is traumatic. Everything we do in our lives is coming from the negative – even if we feel loved and are loving – all sill being subtly conditioned by our self-denial and overall unloving state.

And until we realise the extent of our problem, we won’t understand the extent of our childhood repression.

Childhood repression and our negative state – The Bigger Picture.

This is the overall picture my childhood repression healing has show me.

We are all conceived and born into a self-denying and unloving state of mind – a negative condition of being.

Our parents didn’t mean to do it to us, but couldn’t help it, mostly being unconscious that they were negatively affecting us.

We are forced to take on this negative condition, to make it our life and believe it’s the right way to live. And then everything we do, irrespective of what we may believe, is tainted by – if not completely controlled by – this negative state.

So not matter how good a person you might think you are; no matter how kind and caring and loving you may be; no matter what ‘good works’ you do, you are still doing it all imperfectly and in a false, untrue state of being.

When we feel something is wrong within us; that we are suffering from a childhood trauma; that we are not happy in any way, and want to heal ourselves, we look about trying various methods and approaches to help us. And if we feel we’ve healed or fixed that which we weren’t happy with, then we feel pleased with our apparent success, feeling very happy and much better about ourselves and our lives having solved the problem.

However, all we’ve done is fix one part of our whole negative state. And we happily get on with life, even believing we’ve healed all our childhood repression, when all we’ve actually succeeded in doing is helping ourself live more untrue within our negative state, as we feel now more able and confident to go out there, get what we want, and make life how we want it to be.

To heal ALL your childhood repression means to set out to heal – rectify – ALL that’s wrong within you – ALL your imperfection. And potentially this will take many years, including the healing of your traumas.

The ultimate goal is therefor to become entirely of a positive mind and will. To heal all erroneous beliefs and wrong behaviour adopted from our parents, culture and society. To uncover through our repressed bad feelings as we liberate them, the whole truth of our negative unloving self-denying state; becoming true, loving and completely self- accepting.

And in a way, to become as if we’ve been born anew, with all the pain and trauma from our negative parenting healed, and with the ending of our participation in it.

So in theory, if you were then to have children – once fully healed and of a positive mind and will state – in no way would you unlovingly negatively influence them. In no way would you interfere with them, stopping their natural self-expression.